How Rising Divorce Rates Threaten Social Fabric 

Shumaila Noreen/Farhat Fatima

Islamabad: “In the past, marriage was revered as a union not only between two individuals but also between their families, grounded in values of kindness, truthfulness, and respect.

It was not uncommon for couples to wed without even laying eyes on each other, as the sanctity of the relationship bound them together in a lifelong commitment to love and cherish one another,” remarked Human Rights Activist and Politician, Advocate Amar Lal.

“However, in contemporary times, these standards have shifted, with marriage often being viewed more as a material arrangement rather than a spiritual bond founded on tolerance and understanding,”  Lala further said. 

“The bride frequently fails to embrace her in-laws as her own family, while the groom’s family often calculates the advantages of the union,” he explained. 

“As a result, relationships founded on self-interest rather than mutual accommodation are destined to deteriorate.”

“Even love marriages, once heralded as the epitome of romantic bliss, often falter. Many couples, who were once passionately devoted to each other before marriage, find themselves enduring the pain of an unpleasant separation,” he said.

Modernization and Divorce

As the nation undergoes rapid modernization and societal shifts, the escalating divorce rate in recent years, influenced by various socio-economic and cultural factors, poses a significant threat to our social fabric and familial structures.

Numerous factors contribute to this phenomenon, including financial instability, illiteracy, intolerance, domestic violence, misperceptions, evolving socio-economic dynamics, women’s financial independence, the pervasive influence of social media, familial interference, and, importantly, a waning connection with religious institutions.

In the past, individuals whom we now classify as ‘illiterate’ and ‘backward’ often demonstrated remarkable capacity and depth in maintaining relationships.
Despite their lack of formal education, they excelled as effective communicators and empathetic listeners.

They possessed a remarkable tolerance and ability to comfort their partners during times of conflict.”

It appears that various facets of society, including parents, the education system, religious leaders, and social reformers, share responsibility for the current predicament, as we witness the emergence of an intolerant and self-centered diaspora. In numerous instances, arranged marriages enforced by families suffer a similar fate.

Marital Philosophy Forgotten

A significant portion of our youth lacks a proper understanding of the philosophy behind marriage due to inadequate teaching.

The truth is, when Allah created Eve, Adam questioned her identity, and “Allah” responded that she is his “contentment,” and he must reciprocate with “love and peace.” Regrettably, we have strayed from this foundational philosophy that holds both the groom and the bride accountable for fostering a harmonious family.

Although nothing is beyond the capabilities of the “Almighty”, the partner He chose for Adam underscores the significance of this relationship. He established it as a bond between two individuals and two families, denoting divorce as the most undesirable action.

However, shifting norms and values, coupled with Western influences on our civilization, jeopardize this sacred bond. These influences manipulate agendas under the guise of women’s empowerment, marital rights and responsibilities, and individual autonomy.

Challenges & Causes

Many local organizations also wield influence to the detriment of the noble teachings of our religion. Instead of fostering tolerance and understanding among married couples, their agendas often provoke controversies.

“Extramarital affairs, largely fueled by social media, and men’s reluctance to fulfill financial responsibilities for their families, are key factors contributing to the rising divorce rate in our country,” stated Human Rights Activist Dr Farzana Bari.

She added, “Life becomes incredibly challenging for divorced women in our society due to the lack of social acceptance.”

Dr Bashir Ahmed Shah, a prominent psychologist, views the increasing divorce rate as primarily an urban phenomenon, where women are financially independent and have the option to seek divorce or Khula. He noted, “Sometimes, couples continue their marriage despite conflicts, as they compromise due to financial considerations and societal pressures.”

Bashir Shah observed that false claims by families or unmet high expectations can also lead to separation. “Today, after land dispute cases, domestic abuse and financial maintenance are the second-highest reasons for marital discord,” he remarked.

“As our society evolves and communication technologies provide endless exposure to extramarital affairs, marital dissatisfaction increases,” he observed.

Advocate Rabia Saghar identifies domestic violence and men’s failure to fulfill financial responsibilities as major contributors to divorce. Senior Journalist Imrana Komal urges the state to ensure financial stability to alleviate frustration among married couples and encourages elders within families to intervene in resolving conflicts.

Intolerance Fuels Separation

According to a 2019 survey by Gallup and Gilani Pakistan, 58 percent Pakistanis believed that divorce was becoming more prevalent as two out of five respondents held the couple’s in-laws responsible for most of these cases. 

Another survey conducted in 2023 revealed that the primary reason for increasing divorce rate was lack of commitment, closely followed by infidelity and conflict in families.

As reconciliation fades away gradually, intolerance is rampant leading our congenial life to quarrels, brawls and finally separation.

Two people departing must think what impacts their attitude would be leaving on their children. If they cannot live with peace and nurture their children well, what kind of a nation would they be grooming?

Therefore, it is time for all of us to rethink where we are leading. Are we becoming a fierce crowd instead of a tolerant nation; ruining our customs, norms and culture and ultimately shattering our family fabric.

The report was released by APP. It is reprodcted by The penPk.com.

All information and facts provided are the sole responsibility of the writers.